It's Summer!

The Mayapple flower buds are peanut-sized, the Trillium were open and the sun was hot... that's summer in The South. I should have done this before (I've been busy and away) but today I put the plants and hoses out, raked pear leaves, trimmed dead bushes, sprayed weed killer, broadcast weed-and-feed and turned the sprinklers to Auto. I did all this after completing the usual 6-mile mountain hike in just 2 hours, which is pretty darned good time for the terrain. Did I get extra energy due to the summer sun? What's happened lately? It just might have been closure, finally. Let's hope this continues... it was a terrific day.

While I walked I was thinking that I did not need a reason to be happy... I just am. I am fortunate, too.

- © 2010 by Willy

Sensing

From boyhood, I've been very nearsighted, and almost blind without my glasses (5 spherical). Of course, I need my glasses to drive, bike, use the PC, and watch TV, but not to read nor to work out. Matter of fact, there are advantages to taking my glasses off when on a cardio machine or while lifting weights: it's easier to wipe the sweat off, and I can concentrate better, shutting off the world around me. One problem is that people think I'm unfriendly.

Without glasses, I can only see motion and color, so from a distance I can only recognize two of the guys (and none of the gals) because they shave their heads. If I see a blurry moving figure with light reflecting off their heads, it's likely to be either Charlie or the new guy. And I can tell it's Charlie if there's another moving figure with him, since he's a personal trainer and the new guy isn't. So, there's some sensing that gives me a 50-50 chance of it being Charlie, but there's some intelligence used too that brings that chance to 100% being Charlie.

The same process is used in missile algorithms. The dumb seeker can see only motion and contrast, but the computer inside carries "rules" that increase the probability of what it sees as being the target. For instance, similarly to the Charlie discussion, if the seeker (first rule) finds motion and color/contrast but (second rule) it's only one moving spot, then it may not be a tank, since tanks usually move in packs, and then (third rule) size, color, shape, heat (or whatever) is pursued.

If your dumb eyes tell you that your significant other is (first rule) coming towards you, but (second rule) she's spewing bile, and (third rule) normally doesn't want anything to do with you, then that's not really a significant other. Duh!

- © 2008 by Willy
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Indicator I Was Doing Better

I laughed!

It's been a day-by-day progression out of depression and back into a life with a more positive outlook. It's been five months, and now I can laugh at the whole relationship foible. And now I can laugh at her too. She threw us away, but did us both a favor. If we did not think of the relationship as valuable enough to work at it and save it (and we didn't), then we should have split years ago... if we had a relationship at all to begin with. I found an email dated 2 months after she moved in, documenting problems that we never did solve 4 years later. Funny how hope prolongs your agony.

Now I'm happier, stronger and fitter. With continuing work to get hunk again to pre-relationship levels. I feel better physically and mentally, and look forward to the morning. I sleep better and say "Good morning, God!" rather than "Good God... morning!"

I doubt there will be any contact by her in the future, but if there is, I am not responding. That book is closed and burned. The thunder and lightning is over, and my mind is clear again. And, did I mention... I'm laughing!

-©2007 by Willy
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