I'm Baack

Yes, it's been a while since I posted. It's been one thing after another. From unsuccessful shoulder surgery to the busy end of the Fiscal Year, with a spectrum in-between. I am having fun with friends, regardless... just went to the beach and the National Naval Air museum, again.

This year-end is unusually busy due to the earlier furloughs (off every Friday) getting us behind in our work. Then the sequestration cutbacks' uncertainty made the program offices hold their money until year-end... at which point they had to send funds for work needed before the funds expired. Add to that the actual, real and regular work, as well as more task management, increased demands from supporting elements, delivery of reports, and, of course, next-FY planning with budget funds request. It's been very busy.

Last September, I brought down an old hiker guy off a mile-high Appalachian mountain. The 70-year-old had stability problems and was falling down backwards. I side-hugged him and locked-stepped him down in 6 1/2 hours. Not a smart thing to have done, in hindsight... should have called the rescue squad instead like we did this year on another old coot, because I only have one shoulder left.

Then, following that, in October, I got a virus/bacteria that required a double-dose of Prednisone steroid. It made me feel so good that I pressed more weight for more reps... like a young man. Not a smart thing to do either.

The shoulder hurt: Changing the car radio station hurt. Reaching for the glovebox was very painful. Grabbing something from the back seat was excruciating. I tried months of rest, ice, chiropractor, massage and etc.

The orthopedist did arthroscopic surgery... Resulting in lots of pain, complications, therapy and recovery... all for nothing, because the pain is still there. The orthopedist wanted to operate again and I understood what he wanted to do as deboning chicken, so I fired him, his physical therapist and the horse they rode in on.

I had kept up my hiking and riding. Am back to the gym, taking it easy and doing OK but avoiding overhead shoulder movements. Am doing my own therapy, trying different things out to see what works. My doctor wants me to go get a second opinion from another orthopedist.

My plan is to give it time to heal. It takes a while... everything takes a while to get over, physical or mental, so wish me luck and patience. In the meantime, I'm enjoying life and good friends.

I've been busy.


- copyright 2013 by Willy.

Appreciation

I like it here. I came from a third-world country, and appreciate what we have here. I've been around and this country is the best there is.

Like me, there are many Americans that reflect an uplifting version of democracy. Of hope and trust in our system... that is not shared by others.

Most of us believe in our careers and our work because the job fulfills us and gives us a reason to live. We believe we may actually do some good, whereas others can't wait for early retirement.

Most of us stand tall in front of flag for the singing of The Star Spangled Banner at game or graduation. Others walk around during the moment.

Others don't seem to like their life and disrespect their country, which is their loss. There is always going to be some discontent, and most of us accept that. God help us all.


- text © 2012 by Willy

P.S., A good attitude is healthy.

Free After Three Days

Spin bike for three days of being snowed in, followed by walking the stairs and doing various pushups. Then working on work stuff I had brought home.

Boooring.

But I broke out today!

After three days, a plow... actually a front-end-loader-backhoe... came by the neighborhood and carved a path in the snow and ice. Unfortunately, it shoved a lot of that snow and ice right into my parked cars (my driveway is too steep). It took me an hour and a half of shoveling to free the van (a good back workout), but then came freedom. Sweet freedom. I shed that ball and chain. No more heebie-jeebies. Trapped no more.

Lordy, how in the world did I ever think I could be in any kind of relationship?


- © 2011 by Willy

Action

I'm hyperactive... have ants in my pants and passion in my soul.

I am now packing, ultralight, for a Maine hike. I leave very early Saturday after a night of barbie and brew with the boys.

I had been squeezing in 3 hours of daily cardio, besides the lifting. This week of rest has reminded me that I just don't idle well. The throttle needs to be darn near full-open for this machine to be happy. This applies to all aspects, from work to home and to sleep. At work I've hired 10 new people this past year and my day is still an all-day heart attack. Then I dissipate more fuel afterwards at the gym or outside. Unless I'm exhausted, I don't sleep well, nor feel happy. I'm at my best when I'm contributing fully at what I like. I may not retire until I wear out completely. In the meantime, I'm thoroughly enjoying every adventure, big or small. More hikes and bikes, local and far, as well as growing an army of replacements at work.


It's all about the journey. It's not about watching. It's not about catching what's coming. It's about initiating action to get... anywhere.

I took after my daughter that way.


- © 2010 by Willy

A Real Engineer

The times were when an engineer could work in his garage all by himself and invent a great new gizmo.

Those times are long gone.

Real engineers still help solve problems, first by careful observation and then by bold intervention, but we are now do-it-yourself self-starters with ant-like collaboration. We have to work well with others on our machines. We have to cooperate and coordinate. Sometimes we have differences and we get frustrated. Like brothers, we have to learn to get along and get past our differences. We have to share in the work, in the fun and in the glory. We have to make this people challenge equal to the technical challenge... a problem to solve.


It used to be that all we needed was a wirewrap pencil in a lab. Nowadays, it takes that plus the right words... and only the right words... spoken with all our heart, all our soul and all our might. Whether we like it or not, it's true: we have to work together to get things done.

Well, self... get on with it: go talk to the team and give them some inspiration, and remember that I'm a real engineer. I'm a real engineer. I'm a real... [clicking heels together]. Oh, for the good old days!



- text © 2009 by Willy

Generations

"If they are happy then they are successful" is the modern generation definition.

My older generation defined success as having enough discipline and sacrifice to save the money to afford house, car and kids, the accouterments that went with it, with the requisite independence and contributions. Happy came a distant sixth.

"How is THAT going to make ME happy?" the newbies chant in unison.

The concept of independence has been lost through the generations. My grandparents were able to build a successful life without WalMart. My concept of independence is to stand on my own two feet and bother others as little as possible. Most of the current generation seems to think nothing of bothering friends and family for menial things like dropping off a car for an oil change. They don't even know where the dipstick is, the dipsticks.

My generation would not even think of moving back home with mom and dad... living in a tent being preferred... but many of the new generation do this with no shame... sponging off mom and manipulating dad.

My grandmother thought of a little fat as being healthy, wealthy and successful, since a little fat allowed a person to survive through a famine better than a thin person. Most of this new generation seems to be pure fat but couldn't survive a single day without food, the softies.

In business, the Peter Drucker generation believe success to be determination, goal setting, concentration and courage. Many of the new generation thinks of business success as being able to get something for nothing. They remind me of an irresponsible puppy, cute and entertaining, but useless.

Will this Rome burn?

- © 2008 by Willy
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Working Versus Being There

Why work hard versus just going to work? Why do-the-right-thing and "upset" others instead of just being a buddy and not caring if things get done? Why contribute if you can just do a minimum, chitchat and blow off the day?

I don't know.

That is, I don't know otherwise. Although the word fraud comes to mind as well as irresponsible, immature, useless, and other.

I quit a professional organization three years ago, after 34 years of very active volunteer work because the board was choked down with old deadbeats that didn't do much but get in the way. I got annoyed, recommended that they yield their seats to up-and-coming young 'uns, and quit them.

Deadbeats thrive at work. I always thought the true purpose of a deadbeat is to have a somebody to lay off when layoffs came (but this may not be true, since deadbeats are very friendly good ol' boys). Or maybe their function is to have somebody available for the boss to grade lower than me and thus enable a Gaussian distribution, albeit skewed.

I got rid of a very nice deadbeat a few years ago after three years of no work output. It is frustrating sometimes to work in a place with deadbeats who come in at 9 or 10, take a couple of hours for lunch, then leave early... if they show up at all... be they high-up muckety-mucks or entry level. They can't be avoided, since they permeate society. Personally, I want them away from me, as far as possible. After all, I became an engineer to build machines, not to have to deal with [shudder] people problems. Machines work.

Similarly, I got rid of my deadbeat fiance, "The Ex," last year after 4 years of living together... about 4 years too late. I found great relief when she finally left.

Although there is no training class on how to deal with deadbeats, one thing to consider is that we have been entrusted to be good stewards of our company's money or God's talents, entrusted to you to do a specific job. Another is that we must exercise due diligence in the process. There must be the right work ethic.

If you don't understand these concepts, then please quit and go be homeless on Florida beaches... you'll fit better there. Lead, follow or get out of my way.

- text © 2008 by Willy
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What Else?

"Lord, people have drained me and life is tough. I'm done here... I'm ready to go."

"Not yet. I have sent you into this world with a special act of love to bestow. No one else can offer that act of love... it has been entrusted only to you."

"Lord... Father... I've lived a long life giving to my brothers and sisters. What else do I need to do? "

"When you're done, you can come over."

- text © 2008 by Willy
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Character

Character, it is said, is what you are when nobody's looking.

So, just what is it you are... when everybody's looking?

I just returned home from an interesting geek conference. A narrow-field technical group that gossips about what has gone wrong, what they did about it, and what's coming next. Being a cross-section of nerds, there were the good ones and the bad ones. There were the lazy ones and the hardworking ones. Some were helpful and some were not. Most were there for networking in some form or another, and there was a lot of job shopping. But they were all... interesting... in some way or other. And they were all characters.

A hundredsome of us stayed cooped up all day in a big motel conference room, voluntarily, for a solid week. Most went off to spend the evenings eating, drinking... and networking. Reminded me of the opposite of an ant colony, since most were not workers but rather were looking to use the information and work of the others. Their success at work was based upon networking.

During the offtime, I went to the gym next door instead. I've been successful because I do and I contribute... not because I use interesting others. I'm not controversial and I blend in, but I lead. I volunteered to host the conference in two years.

I've been... doing... since I was 11, whereas others have been carried. That's what I am.

I yam' what I yam'
and that's all that I yam'.

That's my "character," whether somebody's looking or not.

- © 2007 by Willy
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Nightmares

I have had a few recurring nightmares. When I was a young man, I worried about my work responsibilities in getting my engineering projects to succeed, and at home in raising and supporting a family.

From day one I was in a hurry to fly, even though my wings were just not there yet. I concentrated and tried sooo hard! Consistency, time and patience helped... I eventually did grow the wings and I soared with eagles... or at least other swan.

Nowadays my work worries are non-technical... getting everyone covered... and my immediate home stresses are to get on with my life.

One recent personal concern is how close I came to marrying my ex. She appeared innocent but was horrid. A profligate spender, she drove me crazy with demands and criticism, wanting everything her way with no compromise. I was insignificant to her. My recurring nightmares of finding a stranger in the house were based upon her inviting other men over, which was the last straw in a series of cruelties. Who gave her the right to be cruel to me? With her actions she hurt me but set me free. If I had married her, I would have put a gun to my head, which is exactly what she wanted, in issue being my will. How did I fall in love with THAT? And how do I prevent this nightmare from happening again?

I guess that we all stumble in some sort of way. We're not perfect. In mind and in body sometimes we stumble because of somebody else and sometimes it's our own fault. And when we do, it's usually painful. One solution is to stop the world and get off, quit dealing with people and go solo here too. In running, bicycling and triathlons, there's usually a crash at the last hundred yards to the finish line... if you are racing with other people. It seems, no matter what, that emotions and exuberance take over from the rational thinking process... and we crash and burn. Stumbling, in general, is a common concern and nightmare of mine and of many others.

Others have nightmares too. Another recurring nightmare shows me the results of somebody's lack of planning at work. I am a very good planner and even better multiplexer, which is why I am so busy with multiple tasks (I wear 5 hats), and can't understand somebody else's lack of planning. My workday is an orchestrated daylong heart attack, with little time to catch my breath before some "problem" pops into my office needing their shit unclogged. Most of these disasters could have been avoided if the guy had thought ahead to look around and plan. I now have several rolls of toilet paper in my office to hand out to THOSE people. I also tell them that lack of planning on their part does not constitute an emergency on my part. Let them have their own nightmares, instead of passing them to me.

Solutions? Besides going it solo, plan, and not be a co-dependent... two things I do to fight my nightmares are my daily prayers and my weekly massage. Massage is heaven on earth. Not only does it help my mind's anxieties, but also it fixes my beat-up body. I couldn't do my hiking, riding and lifting without it. Thanks, Jan.

Freud said that every dream is a wish. In between nightmares... in between tough parts of my life... I do have some wonderful, warm, peaceful dreams and great sleep. I have started to get these again, my favorite being slowly flying above nature's majesty. I wish for peace and calmness, solo.


- some of this © 2007 by Willy

Secrets of Bike Commuting

My friend Dave, a very fit rider and racer to the max, asked me about my bicycle commuting to work. He's done some, but been thinking of getting serious and increasing to add training miles and reduce his carbon footprint. In his travels, he's also become more aware of the bicycle as a utility vehicle. In addition, we discussed at length earlier this year the use of bike commuting as reflection, meditation and therapy. I also enjoy being closer to Mother Nature, feeling the sun, hearing her symphony and noticing the smells carried by the wind. A good side effect is gas costs... a bowl of cereal takes me in and a banana powers me home.

I use a dedicated commuter bike... a hardtail mountain bike with XT grupo, big under inflated street tires and a rack. Pretty utilitarian and slow, but great training. I've needed this utility... times are when I've got to go off-road due to heavy scary car flow, or to bypass a car line at traffic lights and at traffic pinch points. I've had some adventures. Then there is bad pavement too, but the big, soft, 40 lb tires give me a less-jarring ride. The rack is to carry a briefcase sometimes and the heavier outer shell back home on cold days.

I bike commute when the forecast is for overnight temperatures above 40, rain forecast less than 50%, and no initial rain at start.

I take it easy in the mornings so as to not need another shower but race myself after work to the gym. I take plenty of clean clothes to work on days I do not ride (for whatever reason) and keep there street shoes, ties, comb and the like.

I assume every driver is either not paying attention or out to get me. No, I do not return obscenities.

I also use a dedicated commuter helmet. I wear headlights on handlebar and on helmet, red blinkies on seat tube and helmet. I ride thru residential areas when I can and sidewalks when I need to. Peers ask me if I worry about getting run over and I tell them I'm more worried about cardiovascular disease and cancer.

I wear bright polyprop/lycra and shades, and will add layers as winter proceeds. I never start a ride in the rain, but don't mind getting wet in the warm afternoon. I carry around my waist a wind shell or parka in a tidy small self-contained pouch or bag with built-in web belt, mostly for cold rain. Both the shades and regular glasses are RainX-ed for the afternoon thundershowers. I don't carry cell phone, Blackberry or anything susceptible to water, since I will not call anybody for a rescue in case of a mishap.

The real big secret to successful bike commuting is planning. The best I've done is about two weeks without turning a car key, which takes lots of prior planning for work and errands both. Carrying groceries on the bike is not practical for me (Popsicles would hardly make it), and dry cleaning pickup is impossible.

I highly recommend it. Hope you try it too. Good luck.

- text © 2007 by Willy
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