Ode to mentor

I just buried my friend Bob. He lived to be 72 but had diabetes, and I was surprised that he lasted this long. Bob was a technical tutor or mentor to me and other young men for thirtysome years.

On the other hand, he had his buddies too. His lunchtime bridge games were comical and entertaining. It took 8 pall bearers because 5 were his age. I felt I was carrying the entire thing, quite the honor.

Bob had one note on a wall: "Lack of planning on your part does not make it an emergency on my part." I now have the same on my own wall.

He used to tell us to be tough and smart enough so that others don't take you or your work for granted.

Bob was as jovial as they come. If he wasn't in his office, I just listened for his laughter to find him.

Goodbye, Bob. I miss you.

-© 2008 by Willy

P.S. This was certainly closure. A mental exercise or simulation of which tremendously helped with my ex's relationship closure. This is a mental picture and technique to store in my toolbox.

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Run?

The old saying is that if your nest looks like a cage, run!

But what if it was my nest, that I've paid off, and it was her that perceived it as a cage? I was trapped, taking abuse, and it DID become my cage! What a horrible and depressing predicament. My solution was to grin and bear it, and patiently wait it out... for four years... until my cellmate left.

Lessons were learned here much too numerous to mention, and much too cynical to be entertaining. The funny part is that this was the second time, but it will be my last, for sure.

Things are much funnier in hindsight!

- © 2008 by Willy
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New for Valentine's Day

When the Ex left last year, I went into a depression, followed quickly by a feeling of relief, and appreciation for solitude. I now count my blessings. Tonight I've realized how different this Valentine's Day will be tomorrow.

I won't be spending time at the Hallmark shop and I won't be blowing money sending roses to her work nor buying an additional dozen for home. I will not be going to a crowded, expensive, fancy restaurant I don't like. I won't have to put up with the unreasonable demands that everything be her way nor her continuing abuse, criticism and putdowns. I will not be emasculated this year.

The price I pay for this? Nothing! I wasn't getting any loving, kisses nor hugs... just bitching.

What am I going to do instead? Work, gym, errands, home to check email, and watch TV until sleepy. The same thing I do most week nights. The perfect evening.

- © 2008 by Willy
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The Road Most Traveled

Spring's here! I can tell because women are wearing open-toed sandals, and because there are mountainbikers on the trails.

I love early spring. Women, birds and critters are cute, open-toed or otherwise. Mountainbikers crush last fall's dry leaves to powder, and get rid of spider webs to boot. Creeks fill up, the air is fresh, the sun gets stronger and the views are scenic. It's my favorite time of year for hiking, and I look forward enthusiastically to my early Sunday morning hikes. Eventually, as the temps get higher, I'll switch to cycling on Sundays and begin bicycle commuting weekdays.

Today, I did my favorite hike for the first time this season. My own 2-hour, 6-mile, Walden. The 700 ft climb is gradual, the path is well-maintained and wildlife abundant (huge buck crossed yards away), and the world is serene and quiet. My thoughts were mine. It can't get any better than this.

This is my road most traveled.

- © 2008 by Willy

P.S. This machine's working better!
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Sensing

From boyhood, I've been very nearsighted, and almost blind without my glasses (5 spherical). Of course, I need my glasses to drive, bike, use the PC, and watch TV, but not to read nor to work out. Matter of fact, there are advantages to taking my glasses off when on a cardio machine or while lifting weights: it's easier to wipe the sweat off, and I can concentrate better, shutting off the world around me. One problem is that people think I'm unfriendly.

Without glasses, I can only see motion and color, so from a distance I can only recognize two of the guys (and none of the gals) because they shave their heads. If I see a blurry moving figure with light reflecting off their heads, it's likely to be either Charlie or the new guy. And I can tell it's Charlie if there's another moving figure with him, since he's a personal trainer and the new guy isn't. So, there's some sensing that gives me a 50-50 chance of it being Charlie, but there's some intelligence used too that brings that chance to 100% being Charlie.

The same process is used in missile algorithms. The dumb seeker can see only motion and contrast, but the computer inside carries "rules" that increase the probability of what it sees as being the target. For instance, similarly to the Charlie discussion, if the seeker (first rule) finds motion and color/contrast but (second rule) it's only one moving spot, then it may not be a tank, since tanks usually move in packs, and then (third rule) size, color, shape, heat (or whatever) is pursued.

If your dumb eyes tell you that your significant other is (first rule) coming towards you, but (second rule) she's spewing bile, and (third rule) normally doesn't want anything to do with you, then that's not really a significant other. Duh!

- © 2008 by Willy
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