Two Alligators were sitting around the gym after their workout, talking nutrition.
The smaller Gator turned to the bigger one and said, "I can"t understand how you can be so much bigger than me. We're the same age, we were the same size as kids... I just don't get it."
"Well," said the big Gator, "what have you been eating?"
"Politicians, same as you," replied the small Gator [or Lawyers, Ex'es or whatever].
"Hmm... well, where do you catch them?"
"Down the other side of the swamp near the parking lot."
"Same here! How do you catch them?"
"Well, I crawl up under a car and wait for one to unlock the car door. Then I jump out, grab them by the leg, shake the crap out of them and eat them!"
"Ah!" says the big Gator, "I think I see your problem. You're not getting any real nourishment. See, by the time you finish shaking the crap out of a politician, there's nothing left but a briefcase."
Moral of the story: (1) Watch what you eat... don't eat crap, (2) Bigger is not always better... some people and some Gators are just full of it, and (3) Maybe you're OK just the way you are.
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